SMack!

The Limit

by Ashtarot - 17.01.1999

We received the following mail from a guest and we think it shows an important aspect of our lifestyle.

"I' m a Dom now and i was on the sub side if it for a while and it did help me in many ways. But some of my subs want to be punished more than i was and im scared that ill take it too far sometime!"

One of the problems we always have to deal with ist the fact that our lifestyle has many aspects and many likes and dislikes. The limits of the participants are often very different and it can always happen that a "pushy" sub demands more than you are willing or able to give. Proper and honest communication (see also Communication) is a very important aspect between a sub and a Dom and it doesn't make any sense to go beyond your limits if you are not sure you are able to control the situation anymore.
I know, a sub "in heat" can be very demanding and also very tempting, but not only a sub has limits, we have also and a true BDSM partnerships means to respect those on both sides and establish a honest communication which makes it possible for both to explore those limits without "going too far".
If you get the feeling that the situation starts to get out of control, take a deep breath and slow down - think for a moment, make her wait - get in touch with her - physical contact often helps to relax the situation even without getting intimate.

 Ashtarot

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